Mediate "Rocs" PTI

Rocco Mediate was on Pardon the Interruption this afternoon to talk about the U.S. Open playoff against Tiger Woods Monday, which Woods won in dramatic fashion. I've got to say Mediate is one of the best sports interviews I've seen in a long time. He praised Tiger's gutty play and epic finish and even though he was obviously outclassed in the tourney, he didn't come off as a startstruck nobody who was just happy to be on the same course as a superstar. Not only was he well-spoken and funny, but he seemed genuinely happy to have played 91 holes of competitive golf despite the loss.

Not to say I don't like Tiger--how can you not?--but count me among Roc's fans after his classy performance during and after the Open.

Also, in a later segment, Mike Wilbon implored Tony Kornheiser (who had just said he didn't care about Euro 2008) to "Be a man; watch soccer." Much love to Wilbon for showing respect to the Beautiful Game, which is sadly overlooked in America because of people like TK.

"Javon Walker was asking for it"

Oakland Raiders wide receiver Javon Walker was brutally beaten, robbed, and left unconscious in a Las Vegas street early Monday morning after a night of partying. After being treated for serious injuries, including facial fractures, he is likely to be released from the hospital today. This looks like just the latest in a line of violence against pro athletes who are targeted for their money.

I would hope people would have a little more sympathy for someone who was just assaulted, but somehow they seem to believe that Walker was asking to be beaten and robbed.

These guys are supposed to live in seclusion because they're wealthy? I think a lot of this sentiment comes from people who are jealous of that wealth. "If I was rich, I wouldn't 'make it rain' in the club," they preach. But that's hard to say without ever having been in a position where that was a reality. I'm willing to bet that anybody with that kind of disposable income would choose to enjoy it by indulging in some of life's frivolities. For some, that's houses and cars, and for others, it's expensive nights out on the town.

While it may be a good idea for these high-profile athletes to take extra precautions (hiring bodyguards, etc.), there's no reason to insinuate that they're bringing it on themselves. There's no indication that Walker was engaging in any questionable behavior other than living a life of excess like any celebrity.

I'll reconsider my position if it comes out that this is the result of a confrontation earlier in the night, but consider that this is the same guy who was in the limo with Darrent Williams when he was shot and killed in Denver last January. I'd like to give him the benefit of the doubt, though, believing that he would avoid those situations as a result.

Internet punks beware: piss me off and I'll blog all over you

As a frequent user of Teh Interwebz, I do my best to adhere to certain principles of politeness in my communication with others over computers, especially in "social" settings, such as message boards. It's basic internet etiquette, really: don't type in all capital letters, don't troll message boards, proofread to avoid confusion, don't personally attack other posters, etc. In my experience, most people do a pretty good job of sticking to those unspoken rules. Every now and then, someone comes along who forgets, or simply doesn't know the rules, and that's fine, as long as they change their ways once they've been informed. No harm, no foul.

What really gets my goat, though, are the self-righteous turds who are sticklers for "the rules" until someone says something they vehemently disagree with, at which point all etiquette goes out the window. Consider the following anecdote.

At a sports-related message board I frequent, a user started a thread for those fans who live outside the main market of what they consider to be their "home" team (i.e. people who are New York Yankees fans despite not living in New York). My favorite pro sports franchise is the Washington Redskins. Now, I split my time between Sterling, VA (a suburb of Washington, DC) and Salem, VA (where I go to college), so I am not outside the DC market. But I do encounter an oddly high concentration of Atlanta Falcons fans in the area, which doesn't make sense until you find out that they're also die-hard Virginia Tech fans, and started following the Falcons after they drafted Michael Vick in 2001. Salem's location in Southwest Virginia means it's prime VaTech country.

In my experience, Tech fans are insufferable. I mean, I'm friends with a few, but a surprisingly large number of them are obnoxious drunks who care about nothing other than proving how Virginia Tech's athletics program is the best thing that ever existed (despite having never won a national championship in any sport). All they do is belittle fans of less athletically successful teams (such as my UVA Cavaliers) and make it unsafe to drive on I-81 on Saturday evenings in the fall, when they drive home from the game so drunk that anything in between the rumble strips is "their lane."

Anyway, I mentioned something to the effect that I find many Tech fans inexcusably blind in their support of a program which continues to recruit players with disciplinary problems, despite the long history of hooligans and ne'er-do-wells associated with the school's sports teams--in particular football. And that's without the Vick brothers entering consideration, even though the younger showed his true colors again this week.

I posted my feelings in the aforementioned thread because I felt they were at least a little relevant. Nobody had a problem, save one self-righteous twat Virginia Tech student who came out of the woodwork with the following:

Thats probably one of the most ignorant statements I have ever seen.Thugs and hooligans? The Vicks are gone and Ore got kicked off the team for his off the field issues. You have no clue what you're talking about. The Blacksburg cops have consistantly harrassed VT players for
minor issues, they're not ****ing thugs, you're just an idiot.Thats a typical bull**** UVA fan excuse when you can't keep up with Tech "Yeah well at least OUR players aren't thugs...look at Vick!!!!"People supported Vick because of what he did for the program but there are tons of diehard Redskins fans in Southwest Va.Don't post this garbage about my school and its fans.

I probably would have let him slide if he hadn't been the same punkass who, two days earlier, was busy telling people not to attempt to circumvent the profanity filter (i.e. writing "f*ck") because "it's against the rules." Never mind that as soon as he gets bent out of shape he'll fly off the handle and personally attack me for my well-formed opinion, derailing an erstwhile lively thread and generally just being a bitch. Not only did he shoot back a pathetic, sissy-boy argument, he fulfilled his reputation as a buzz-killing thread hijacker. Not to mention he actively stereotypes me--an act which he had just finished declaring as deplorable.

You're on notice, "DarrellsMyHero28." Your hypocritical douchebaggery will not be tolerated.

America's nukes controlled by... Sony?

As you may have heard, yesterday the U.S. Department of Energy unveiled "Roadrunner," IBM's new supercomputer that is supposed to be the most powerful in the world by a wide margin. It was developed to perform calculations simulating, among other things, nuclear blasts. The idea is to test the aging supply of nuclear warheads without having to actually detonate them, which in general sounds like an excellent idea.

What you probably didn't hear is IBM VP David Turek's description of it as basically "a very souped-up PlayStation 3."

What?

"We took the basic chip design [of a PlayStation] and advanced its capability," Turek said.

So now the only thing standing between us and a nuclear winter is an overpriced game console that occasionally decides to cease all function. One the bright side, this development does give me hope that I can solder my Xbox to my laptop and improve my stock portfolio.

Total Football totally dominates

Edwin van der Sar kept a clean sheet as the Dutch stunned defending world champs Italy 3-0, just the second time the Netherlands have ever defeated Italy, and the first time since 1978.

Italy hadn't allowed an opponent to score 3 goals since August 2007 in a friendly against Hungary. In the last meeting between the two teams in 2005, Italy prevailed 3-1 in Amsterdam. I don't think anybody would have predicted the Dutch to score 3 goals against--let alone beat--Italy, who were favored by many to win the tournament at its start. It's especially surprising given that throughout its international soccer history, Italy has a reputation as a defensive juggernaut whose strategy is to score a goal and then construct a 30-foot stone wall at the midfield line to prevent opposing players from approaching the goal, resulting in some of the most boring 1-0 games you'd ever hope to see. Or sleep through the second half of.

Nevertheless, Ruud van Nistelrooy opened the scoring in the 26th minute on a controversial goal (which, upon review, was declared legitimate by everybody who knows what they're talking about--i.e. not Julie Foudy), and the Orange Crush never looked back.

Van der Sar looked like Superman as he made several world-class saves that allowed the Dutch side to keep their momentum, the most spectacular of which began the couterattack which resulted in the deal-sealing goal in the 79th.

It was obvious that Italy missed their injured captain, pretty-boy central defender Fabio Cannavaro. Manager Roberto Donadoni said before the match that there would be no drop off in quality of play in Cannavaro's absence, and fill-in Andrea Barzagli promptly made a liar of him, deciding to pay homage to host nation Switzerland by anchoring a defense that, like the country's signature cheese, stank and was full of holes. The back line allowed 3 goals for the first time ever in a Euro Championship.

There's your goals, Foudy. Feel free to shut your horse-toothed mouth.

Why Julie Foudy is ruining sports

Euro 2008 is in full swing, and as a former high school soccer benchwarmer and consequent expert on the sport, I am glued to ESPN2 every afternoon. To a greater extent, though, I am also a connoisseur of sports commentary. Having made the transition from watching soccer in a uniform on the bench to my underwear on the couch with a beer and a sandwich, I see a wide spectrum of quality in commentary ranging from exemplary (Derek Rae and Adrian Healey's Champions League coverage) to piss-poor (any NFL broadcast not including Jim Nantz and Phil Simms).

I'm past the age where summer means lazy days in the sun, but I still look forward to it for one reason: I get to watch soccer. Living in America, it's hard to find soccer on TV, and when I do it's usually MLS (which I'm sad to say is nowhere near as entertaining as the prestigious European leagues). But once the weather gets warm, that means it's Champions League time--the one time of the year when there's quality soccer to be seen without paying exorbitant prices for obscure satellite TV packages. And in even-numbered years there's international soccer to be seen, be it the Euro Championships or World Cup. Not only does the sport satisfy my appetite for the "beautiful game" which continues to grow even though I no longer play competitively, but it generally offers some respite from the in-your-face, hyper-commercial American sports arena. Subtlety reigns supreme in soccer, and good commentators (specifically those from Europe, where subtlety is still appreciated) tend to let the game speak for itself. I admire that respect for the game. It's refreshing, especially in the middle of the NBA finals where Mark Jackson and Jeff Van Gundy spent more time last night wisecraking and ballbreaking than actually commenting on the game. The focus should be on the game. The voices I hear should involve me in the game, not distract me from it.

That's why I hate Julie Foudy.

Foudy is a poor commentator who falls back on her underdeveloped sense of humor to fill her air time. When paired with real, game-focused commentators like Andy Gray it makes for uncomfortable moments--and poor coverage of the game. Rather than watching Julie Foudy and her distracting facial moles tell stupid jokes about France not being able to score any goals, I find myself losing interest and turning away from the coverage in favor of late-90's sitcom reruns on TBS, leaving me wishing someone would Just Shoot Me instead.

It's not all Julie Foudy's fault, though. She was one of the best female soccer players in U.S. history, and she does deserve some respect for that. But the American media have embarked on a crusade to take all focus away from news stories themselves, and put it instead on "highly qualified" pundits whose experience in their respective fields has somehow earned them credentials to explain to us why Politician X is and unfit leader, or why Celebrity Y has gone of the deep end, or why Iggy and the Stooges don't have any of the 100 greatest guitar songs of all time. (Seriously? "Search and Destroy" will melt your face. And blow out your speakers. Whoops.)

Anyway, Julie Foudy managed to get a job behind the commentator's desk which she is in no way qualified for. She's one of the more recent in a long line of former sports stars who networks hire in order to attract viewers. But for those of us who were already planning to watch, it's discouraging and annoying. And that's saying something, because not many people in this world are so annoying that rather than listen to them, I would watch a sitcom starring David Spade.

Get Hooked

This is not my first attempt at a blog. I started strong on the last few, but my effort (or interest) always petered out and I ended up closing them down when I got frustrated because I couldn't reproduce the edge and wit that originally drew me to to blogging world. This time around, though, I've resolved firmly to see this thing through, whether or not anyone reads me.

Each day, I'll talk about something that reaches out from the media-dominated abyss of our 21st century existence and "hooks" me, catches my interest for some reason or another. It'll usually be something to do with sports, music, movies or news, but everything is fair game. I embrace inspiration from wherever it comes, even if it is the E! True Hollywood story of Hulk Hogan.

So, to paraphrase John Popper of Blues Traveler, hopefully The Hook will bring you back.